So Many Things I Want to Say

The title really says it all.

I've been writing this post for a while now. I have about 5 different draft versions but none of them really accomplish what I need them to. You'll have to hang in there if I get off course or ramble.

When I started SL 5.5 years ago things were SO different. Or at least maybe they just feel that way. I've realized for the better part of the past year I've been hanging onto something that doesn't really exist anymore.

I've written this part here a million times over and I always seem to run on and on or tell stories so I'll say it flat out.

It's time for me to cut the apron strings of Second Life.

It's just time.

I have been and learned so many amazing things during my time in the virtual world. I've met amazing people, learned new skills and had the time of my life. I can credit Second Life to leading me to the love of my life. It helped me learn to ease out of my shell and reach for things I never even dreamt were possible. It's been an amazing experience.

As much as I love being here I can't keep holding on. As I said when I started this, so much has changed. I've watched beloved friends walk away, watched favorite places close- it's hard. After a while you start to wonder why you bother to meet people when they all seem to move on. For me Second Life eased me through the deaths of 2 amazing people in my Real Life. I had a support system that I needed so badly.

I won't be going immediately- I want to make that clear! I'm hoping to use the next few months as an easing out process. When I realized that so much in my RL was changing, SL was put on a back burner. Like so many others before me, it's time to focus on the real world.

My premium account will run until the end of October. I decided I might as well finish out my one and only year of premium membership! You'll see me on a lot less. In the past month my logins have become less frequent and much less long. At this point I've been logging on long enough to get messages, unsubscribe from notices and deal with my land holdings.

[Blossom] will remain open during this fade out phase. Customer Service will remain intact. I won't however be adding to the current collection like I had anticipated. I've loved this store so much. It became an outlet for me. I've loved experimenting and creating new items! It's been amazing. I can still remember the months before I officially opened! The excitement I felt that I would be sharing my ideas wit the world. The only flaw in my plan is that there have been so many before and after me, and so many who have done better. I've never been good at it, but I've had a damn good time.

As for this blog, I plan to stick around for at least a few more months too, if not until the membership is up. We'll see how it goes. As with not logging on as frequently, my blogs and fashion posts will become less. I hope to still participate in Monday Meme's and such!

Anyway, I just wanted you all to know what was going on. I hope you will stick around while I am still here! I have treasured you all so very much. Just knowing someone is out there connecting and reading along will me has been so amazing! I love you all and thank you for your support over the years. It's been a trip!


It's time for Khloe to throw in the towel.

There I fixed it!: The case of the amazing alpha killer and the IM eating Monster

OKay, if you've read any of my recent posts than you know I am having some massive issues with rezzing n SL lately.

 I have been unable to change any clothing at all. When I attempted to use system layers or alpha items would either not show up or the wrong alphas were showing up! I thought maybe it was a weekend issue so I attempted to change from a blazer to a sundress this afternoon. Both items were mesh with alpha layers. The dress alpha never showed up. The blazer alpha refused to go away. I relogged, cleared cache, changed locations, and nada. Nothing helped. I even took everything on me off and tried just system clothing. It took my system shirt a full 2 minutes to even show up- and even then only on my end. My system pants never showed up but a pair of mesh shorts I had worn 2 weeks ago attached themselves out of the blue. It's been REALLY odd.

Over the past few weeks I have barely logged on because I have no interest in being unable to change clothes. I told my husband I was seconds away from giving LL and SL the finger and going on my merry way. It was that frustrating. I spoke to numerous people who had me do all sorts of odd things- none of which made any difference what so ever.

In a fit of despair I started poking around my preference tabs. Maybe something during the update got messed up? It couldn't hurt to look.

While browsing my graphic preferences I noticed something interesting.

The section halfway down that says Alpha Mask Rendering. I don't generally dig around in my preferences too much so I have never noticed this. My first thought when reading the 2 options was "What the heck is Advanced Lighting Model?!?!"

I was kind of curious if the fact that they were both checked was the reason I was having issues? So I snooped some more!

Under General Graphics I saw this:

On the left, under Shaders, second from the bottom. When this is checked it turns on Ambient Occlusion, shadows and the like. I like shadows but I decided to see what unchecking it would do- if anything.

Immediately ALL my textures rezzed properly! What the heck?! So I toggled it again and left it checked this time. My issues were still gone.

So conclusion: If you have alpha or rezzing issues like me- Toggle the Advanced Lighting Model check box and see if that sorts you out!

Please let me know if this helps anyone out there. I'm still scratching my head.

Another mind boggling issue is my lack of offline messages. I recieved an IM this afternoon from a friend who pretty much told me off for ignoring her. I was pretty surprised because well, you all know that no one ever really ims me. I had a mega case of what the heck? The last known logs I had were from April and it was me contacting her with no response. I haven't been on much since then so I was pretty surprised to learn she had left me numerous offline ims. I never got ANY of them until her offline today. That's a whole new ballgame for me to figure out. So.... if you actually took the time to IM me and never got any responses: wait 24 hours, try again, catch me when I am online (be quick!) or send me a notecard. As far as I know, I get those!

Gah SL is a crap shoot lately.

The Great Confession

I've been such a bad blogger lately! Oops. I totally missed last week's meme, and am already a day behind in this weeks! Someday I will get my shitaki together, maybe...

BY the way my auto correct tried to change Shitaki to skidmark... just to share.

So, it's Confession Week y'all?! Share 1-10 of you deepest Second Life secrets! Annnd GO!

1. I justify all my purchases with "I can blog it!" : I hate to spend anything in SL. There have been times where I will buy something I don't actually need" just so I can  blog it". I almost NEVER do. I always have the best of intentions and sometimes I even take pictures, start a post and then forget about it. I do this a LOT.

2. My shape is a fraud: I've harped before on how much I love my shape! I've even gone so far as to say it's MY shape. I'm such a fraud. The shape I've worn for close to 5 years?- That shape is originally my husband'/s creation. He had a fantastic female avatar and I always looked like a creepy beanpole with giant boobies. FInally he offered it to me (or i begged..) So in truth, the only "mine" thing on my avatar is my face. For shame.

3. I'm a hoarder: My overflowing inventory is organized to the point of being anal. I have folders>sub-folders>sub-sub-folders. I also have a million "boxed" items. I have this fear that is I delete anything I may someday need it. But really, when am I ever going to wear that totally system outfit from 2008, or that skin I tried to make in 2009? NEVER

4. Profiles are for stalkers like me: We may have lost touch, or had an epic fight. But guess what? Chances are I still read your profile from time to time to see what you are up to, if you are still around or if you have fallen from grace. It's a compulsion.

5. Stalking 2.0?: So I rarely leave my platform for anything other than shopping or event reviews. I do go to one club. I secretly know someone who works there. They are from my past and we didn't end out friendship well. I liked the club before I realized she worked there and was unwilling to give up a place with people who actually know who I am and greet me! She imed me a few times and I have acted like I have no idea who she is. :O

6. I'm BORING: I complain about not having friends or being invited places. If I'm being honest though? I hate going out a lot- my internet is crap and I tend to get slow. Also when people IM me I tend to let conversations trail off to nothing. Most of the time beyond "Hello" and "How are you?", I have nothing left to say unless you have something to contribute.

7. I have a volcano temper: I'm really easily angered when supposedly simple things in SL don't work. When I can't get to an event, or your vendor is offline or your MP never delivers my item- I can get super bitchy. Mostly to myself and occasionally on here. I can EXPLODE with rage until I realized I am getting mad at pixels on my  computer and then I feel like a dumb ass. I secretly hate when someone IMs me about my store- in a bad way. If my vendor is not working, or something is wrong- I have no issue fixing it. Heck that is what I'm here for. On the flip side of this I've also have someone IM me in a superior manner trying to tell me how I should be running things, why my vendors are not to their liking or something that really is not their concern- It pisses me off.


Alright I'm tapping out! That was a pretty hard list of things. Okay, okay- confession bonus? Sometimes I read your blogs to get ideas for my answers. Sorrrry. Or not. This post makes me sound like some psycho person. Awesome sauce. Whatever, that's me folks!

Worn: Grace top from Kanou. There are a whole bundle of colors now.

I'm not wearing any pants! Sorry. Actually I do that a lot.. Confession # 9?

Quick Update

I've been having some problems with SL for the past few weeks.

My inventory loads incorrectly; things have been going missing. My clothes are not rezzing. The last few changes to outfits I have tried for 2 weeks now have left me stuck with random alphas from long ago clothing, blurred skin or just totally grey.

This has been happening a lot for a few weeks . I mentioned it previously. Last month my walk, 2 stands and my favorite sit stopped working. As in I received an error saying these items didn't exist. I've been using a lot of the same animations for YEARS.

What I'm trying to say is... To anyone who recently invited me to an event, gave me a review copy, or asked me to review something: I'm sorry. I currently am unable to even so much as change my outfit. I don't know what is happening here. I've been trying to get things sorted out. It gets better and then goes back to bad again. I promise to talk about your items when things are a little easier! I have NOT forgotten you!

[Blossom] is currently on hold as well. It's been too hard to rez something that I might not ever get back. My store and MP remain open of course!

Hope everyone is having a lovely weekend!

You Can't Handle the Truth !!!

I FREAKIN' MADE IT!

After over 2 weeks I have FINALLY made it to Truth. The sale is still on!

 (PS. Alicia I totally blame you for this! I haven't logged on to SL in 36 hours and was going for another full day until I saw your latest fashion post. Saw hair and ran like a little child head first into SL)

So I made it. Squee. I've been standing here for almost an hour and nothing is changing from the grey mess I see. FML. I've snagged demos of thing I can't even see. I might be wearing mens hair for all I know.

What I fia most amazing is the fact that I haven't actually bought a hair from Truth in probably over a year. It's not that I'm not a fan..I just tend to get stuck on a hair and wear it until it literally goes out of style. Plus I hate shopping for hair the most. so Yeah.

I'm too sexy for my hair...

 Behold the hotness of the... sheesh it looks like a spider leg. As you can see the building rezzed, mostly. The ceiling and opposite walls were not showing up. The vendors and people are mostly grey. I've bought 20 demos and only got one. YAYYYYY And then you crash. It would seem my avatar is now trapped in the sim. I can't log on and it hasn't logged me out yet. Amazingly enough, just before I crashed the entire store rezzed crystal clear- figures!

Maybe I should have just stuck to not logging in at all.

Dear Mr. Hawks,

Please, for the love of god, have your sale extend to your MP page. All I want to do is give you money for things I really don't need. and I just can not seem to.

Regards,
Trapped

Also, when people ask me why I have such hater-ade for mesh attachments like tatas, heads, hands and lower limbs. THIS is why.

 

When you walk by me with no head or legs It's like something out of a horror movie. No thanks. Then again none of my attachments are currently working so I'm bald and maked..with no AO. Winning!

I made it in again after 20 minutes and crashed immediately. It's not worth it. I'm going back to RL now.

Wish You Were Here!

If there is one thing I can always count on in SL, it's the seasons. No matter how horrible and cold it might be outside it's always paradise here whenever I want it to be!

Today marks the beginning of the first ever 2013 Sand & Sea Expo! If you are looking to turn your home into a beach oasis then this might be the place for you. The event takes place from 3pm SLT Today May 2nd - May 5th.

You'll find everything from home/beach decor to novelty items, beach wear and undersea fantasy mermaids. The event takes place on 2 since. Both sims are filled with sand dunes, palm trees and docks. You'll notice that many of the items shown as decor can be found at various vendors around the sims. Both sims consist of above water and under water displays.

Beach Landing Point

Underwater Landing Point

You'll do well to notice that each vendor has been asked to place a shell out. They have generously donated free items for these shells. All you have to do is click to receive a free prize. There is one catch though. Sometimes when you click you may be told to try back in 2 hours. Not every click receives a gift but you can always try again later. The old catch and release. Draw me in, deny me and draw me back again. Good luck. Also, keep an eye out for tons of free goodies. in addition to the shell prizes I noticed a few vendors have also offered up additional group gifts, or freebies.

You'll be looking for:

 For more information on this event, a list of vendors and a list of bloggers you can check out the website - HERE-

Big thanks to Cortez for pulling this all together!